bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Randomize
