He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize
