Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
We're not piercing ourselves today.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize