well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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