I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
