dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
This is the prime rib incident all over again
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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