she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
