Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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