We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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