she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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