What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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