I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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