She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
