found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Randomize
