Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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