i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Randomize
