Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize