Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
