And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I FOUND THE LEGS
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
