Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
