Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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