I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Randomize
