I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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