How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
