I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
