We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
