I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
