It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
