awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
then he tried to convert me to islam
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Randomize
