Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
