you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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