Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Randomize
