I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
