i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
