So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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