You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
