So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
