it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Randomize
