As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Is it because I queefed?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
