actually, I'm a sock model
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
