He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
