Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I enjoy the company of your penis
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
