I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
