But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
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