I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
