the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
BRING THE BAGELS
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
My vagina just clenched in fear
PANTIES FOUND
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
