i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize