I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
