My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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