Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
