i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
